Monday, May 21, 2007

Another princess?



All of a sudden DQ is wanting to wear dresses every day just like her big sister. Will we end up having two princesses in this household?

Even the naughty one can be cute.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

A letter to the queen


Dear Drama Queen,

You know I love you to pieces. You have a crooked little smirk of a smile that just melts my heart. I love it when you get excited over the little things - seeing a dog, swinging, jumping, taking your pants off by yourself... It also makes me so proud you are starting to get interest in potty training. Tonight you pooped in the potty and wore your big girl underpants to the store without an accident! Great job!

But, DQ? You are not even 2 yet, but I feel like we have been going through the "terrible twos" for over a year now. I know you are just advanced for your age, but the screaming and tantrums makes your mommy crazy. So knock it off. I know you get frustrated when you can't do something, but you don't need to throw a fit. Let me help you. And can you work on your listening skills? I know you can understand me when I am talking to you. Please just do what I say and move on to something else. You don't have to say NO all the time. There is no reason to scream and cry every time I leave the room. I know you love me and want to be with me all the time, but sometimes I just want to use the bathroom by myself. I will be right back I promise. You don't do this with daddy. Please don't do it with me either.

Also, please do not fight with your sister. Can you just try to get along? No more hitting or pushing. When you do stuff like that both of you end up crying. Wouldn't you rather just play together?

And while we are talking, let's take a moment to review table manners. When you try something you do not like, please do not take it out of your mouth and put it on my plate. Mommy doesn't want it either. When you finish eating, do not throw you plate on the floor. I don't don't want to sweep the floor every single night. Just leave what you didn't eat on your plate and I will take care of it when I am finished. If you food is too hot, make sure you blow on it to cool it off. Spitting on your food just makes it soggy and it grosses the rest of us out. I am really proud that you are now drinking out of a big girl glass, but please remember to swallow your milk. Do not spit it out of your mouth. I know it feels cool to have milk run down your face, but it is really messy.

One more thing. Please limit the amount of time you spend picking your nose. I understand it is a great way to past the time, but it is not very lady like. If you do pick your nose and dig out a prize, I don't need to see it. I am sure you are proud of your find, but please just keep it to your self. Or wipe it on your daddy, that would be okay also.

We are going on vacation next week and I am worried about these issues while we are away from home. There is going to be a lot to do and lots of people around. Please be on your best behavior. You are going to have a lot of fun. It's okay to take a rest when you get tired. You do not need to keep up with the older kids.

I know we don't spend very much one on one time together and I will try to change that. Maybe we can make a deal. If you scream and cry less, I will be more willing to take you places. Sound good?

Just some things for you to think about.

Love,

The Royal Highness

Monday, May 14, 2007

Tonight's episode of Dancing with the Stars.

Here is a recap of tonight's episode:

The opening act was a playful number with both finalists.


In Round 1, the princess started out strong with the Salsa.

DQ danced the Fox Trot and got a little carried away with her props, but had a strong ending.

Next up in Round 2, the Princess danced the Quick Step. Her choreography was flawless. Perfect 10s from the judges.

DQ must have gotten a little nervous from the Princess's perfect performance. DQ tried to entice the judges with a strip tease dance.

She was later disqualified.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Mother's Day Bike Ride


I think the bike ride wiped me out also. I have nothing creative to say.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's out there!

Monday, May 7, 2007

Dear John...

Dear Monte,
You have been in my life for almost 9 years. We’ve had a lot of good times and I’ve really enjoyed being with you. However, it is time for me move on. I’m sorry, but I am really needing someone a little more family oriented and I don't think you are going to change. I think it’s time we broke up.

You were my first and you will always have a special place in my heart. At first, your only role was to be eye candy. I didn't expect much from you except good performance. Then you started taking on more duties. I made you carry my bikes. The king made you pull his golf cart. Sometimes, you even carried around both of the girls around at once. Let's be honest, you were just not made to do all this.

I wish you the best of luck. I’m sure I will be seeing you around and I don’t hope it will not make you uncomfortable when I am with my new ride. You just aren’t family material and I need to think about the future. I need to move on to the next phase of my life. My life as a Mini-Van Mom.

Love,
Your Royal Highness


Thursday, May 3, 2007

CSI: The Castle

There has been a crime spree in the castle the past 24 hours. Our investigators have been hot on the case.

Yesterday evening the King's wallet was taken out of our bedroom after the girls were sweetly sleeping in beds. The intruder removed nearly everything from the wallet including credit cards, pictures, punch cards and his drivers license and left the empty wallet in the middle of our hallway. The intruder must have felt sorry for the King and left his $4 in cash. Later we found the the contents of his wallet in the princess's bed. We believe the looter was trying to frame the princess since there was no way she could have have done this since she was asleep at the time of the crime.

Today when the King was home with our little angels alone, vandals came into the house and smeared the King's lotion all over the princess's bedroom. Evidence of the vandelism was everywhere.



The King was beginning to worry that he was the target of all this crime activity. However this evening, shortly after I had cleaned our kitchen floor, a graffiti artist decided that our white floor needed some color.



Our officials have one suspect in custody and are currently questioning a possible accomplice. No motives are known at this time.

Another conversation from the car...

Momma?
Yes princess?
My boogers match the trees.